childhood crushes..

 ok well tbh i cant really even do this because thing because,, ive never actually had childhood crushes before. 💀 can never relate when ppl talk abt this. omg i hate when people at school ask me who my crush is or if i have a crush on so-and-so what am i even supposed to say... anyway idk how everyone has all these childhood crushes, why did i never experience that :((

like youve gotta be kidding me. maybe theres just something wrong with me idk. honestly as a child whenever i watched movies i thought romance like kissing scenes were the grossest thing in the world. for example i remember watching aladdin in some sort of class and being so disgusted by the kiss scene. now though, idm some romance stuff that much anymore since ive been exposed to it a lot. 

ok but for real people, ive only had 1 crush in my entire life, in kindergarten bruh. i dont even really remember having a crush on them but i guess i did 😭im told it probably wasnt even a real crush cuz i was so young.

i dont really understand how everyone had all these crushes on characters and celebrities and whatnot. what does a crush even feel like anyways. i can never tell if it is or not?? there are characters i adore but i couldnt say i have/had a crush on them.

 ever since i got back from college why do i feel so tired and lethargic all the time 😭😭im even getting more sleep than i did back over there wtf. i have a lot of things i want/need to do but i just feel so lazy and tired man. oh my gah dont tell me im one of those people that need a strict structure/schedule to get things done 😭😭noooooo 

been wanting to do this template for a while

 

random but ive seen ppl replace
mouse with horse for some reason

also i love that mira has a long face, female chars esp in cartoons and anime always have a round face. her hair is so fun to draw too :D

idek how i came up with this

 

i miss making anj fanart i used to have so many ideas but never drew them

one more doodle

type of friendship i could only dream about

 

Bruh youve gotta be joshing me rn..

Suddenly remembering this one moment in 4th grade. Ok basically I was moving away so like saying bye to my classmates n stuff. And they also were saying a few things too. This one boy.... oh man I don't remember exactly what he said but it was like "I didn't even notice you were in the room half the time" (cuz I was the quiet kid) and then something else i don't remember what he said tbh but it was nice? Like "but you're chill/ a nice person" idk. It's the first part that really stuck with me 💀 I took it as a compliment at the time but now I realize that's kinda a weird thing to say 😭 why did I take that as a compliment 😭😭

I remember 4th grade so clearly it was a crazy year lots of memories 

Helpppr ☹️ school vent

Art school is killing me 😭😭 my arm and back hurt from drawing in uncomfortable environments 😭 I miss my old desk and chair man

Bruh the food here is so repetitive and most of it tastes mid to bad and is unhealthy 💔😔

My skin got worse since I got here and my eczema also came back on both arms and its so painful AHHHHHHH I'm gonna crash out. And I'm sick of the moldy dorms and showers 😭

Also need to draw so quickly to meet deadlines and its lowkey stressful idk what happened but I draw really slowly now 💀 only for lineart tho. 

The grind never stops.... 

I wonder how much worse going to college fr will be... imagine doing art and also having other classes and juggling grades and chores and living in a small dorm with a roommate for 4+ years AND being in debt omg. 

Fashun thoughts

Brahhh I really wish to be able to express myself through my appearance more 😭 or just look how I wish I looked. I wanna wear clothes from a variety of styles, seeing all the different kinds of things people wear online is sooo amazing fr. Also think it would be cool to try some styles once just for fun like goth or lolita or gyaru idk.

Unforch.. I'm poor and not confident so I can't 😭 Maybe when I'm an adult/move out from parents home... Who else has a parent that never really let you pick your own clothes 💔💔 so u just wear whatever and don't even know what you want anymore cuz u never got the chance to choose what you liked 

Omg also I think it would be really fun to do a cosplay with a group of friends. And wearing fun/vibrant makeup styles looks cool too. Alsoo I really want to cut/dye my hair different colors but I'm also tryna grow it smh my head

Ok last thing I love people who are dedicated to a style fr 🫶🫶 (Or wearing a silly outfit like a lorax costume lol.) I just love seeing their fits/makeup. Its nice to see people who can express themselves like that unabashedly ourghhf. There are a few of those types of people in my school rn. Maybe cuz this is an art school lol 

This was my skibidi toilet. Back in the day

😭😭😭

 

drawing for reference

Was walking to dinner today and saw these two women they were both really tall and had long legs, they looked like models 😭 they were so pretty.. why are there so many divas here. Ngl I like people watching it's fun 

Ts is so random but has anyone else had to tell themselves repeatedly like "they won't hate me" to try to reassure yourself every time you wanted to text someone or am I just weird 😭😭 man I have such a complex about talking to ppl (esp first) I always think I'm bothering them 😭 

This problem used to be way worse for me since the beginning of the school year I just finished lol, got a bit better about it now tho 🥳👍 

SAD is the gift that keeps on giving. Smh my head 

Song OTD

 

Today's song OTD is The Star, To You 17 Years Old by NASTYONA! This is so bittersweet :( The beat/melody of this song is very comforting and familiar. 

bro how are other people able to be so free and emote and stuff 💔 like doing silly voices/faces, voice inflection, etc. just being able to express themselves in a variety of ways. i feel like some sort of robot that's trying to blend in with everyone but failing miserably 😭 idk. wish i could do the same but im so monotonous and timid in my actions and voice even when im trying not to be 💀😭 i probably come off as so cold and boring to others 🫩 

Kinda want to do this but i dont have followers.. 🥀🥀

 

tv girl

These people will see anything pink and blue and immediately shout out, "tv girl?!" "tv girl reference?!" and there are dozens of these comments.. even when the art is obviously not 😭😭 and then there are no comments abt the actual art just tv girl copy pastes 💔💔 why does everything have to be tv girl smh my head. These artists are most likely just using complimentary colors bffr. 

Oops

Guys no posts again for like 3 weeks cuz im not at home 💀 or maybe I'll post some things but not a lot... and probably no more song otds for a while too 

I know I just got back but uhm... yeah 😭

Song OTD

 I'm backk woohoo! Feels like I haven't done a song otd in weeks... omg and i just realized its july 2nd today whatt i thought it was still june somehow lol. anyway today's song otd is esper by mamerico! i like the lilting tone of the singer's voice... this song is so calm and nice. that cover is so cute too