happy last day of march 

i cant believe its april already (almost) !! no more cold weather plssss 

 omg gruhh its spring break finally 😭😭🙏 someone tell me why it doesnt feel like it at all tho. it feels like a thursday ngl. i cant believe im gonna be working all break 💀this sucks

also cant believe after this the next break is gonna be summer break. im so ready 

end of school bruhh

 today i finally picked up my cap and gown ts crazyyy. we had to order them near the beginning of the school year and its already almost over now 🤯🤯

also im so not excited for my ap exams i dont even feel good about my ap art portfolio 😭😭i feel like i should try/study for the credits but i really dont want to. im so done with my classes man

i wanted to say something else but i forgor so im gonna rate my high school years

1. senior year - this is the year where im the most sociable and i dont have 8 classes so its really nice :D

2. junior year - i liked a lot of my classes & the people in them (even tho i was too shy to actually befriend them) and this was the year i started trying to improve my social anxiety a little bit 

3. freshman year - my art teacher genuinely cared about me and it was so nice </33 i miss her class still. i liked my history class too and i read a ton of books that year 

4. sophomore year - transferred to this dogwater school im in rn and wanted to kms. i was literally like a ghost this year. but i also really liked my history class that year. and phones were still allowed back then 

Song OTD

 

Today's song OTD is Le recit de Cassard by Michel Legrand! This song is so peaceful and relaxing. It makes me want to walk in a field or on a path with rice fields in the springtime while listening to this. 

I've been trying to listen to music more now again and its so nice. Kpop lowk my jam lately. Also spotify is recommending me ryuichi's music all of a sudden it was shocking to see it pop up lol

hair

 i lowkeninely want to dye my hair this spring/summer bruh but im scared of doing anything to my hair because of damage and it grows so damn slow 💀 if it ruins my hair and i need to chop it off i will cry forever. since i have long hair itll be expensive too. i dont wanna ruin it but im bored of my hair lowkey. i feel like my only feasible option would be to dye a wig lol or get extensions 

ouhhgg i wish so bad you could customize yourself easily like a video game character 

maybe ill just go for it anyway since you only live once and stuff 

my blog

 bruhh my blog is dying idk what to post anymoree 😭also when i post and re-check its been like 5 days and it shocks me bc it feels like it's only been 1 day ..,, im gonna end up with 6 posts in 1 month at this rate brah

i remember when i used to post 3-4 times in a day thats so crazy what was i doing back then 

i am so woke

 bruh sometimes i wonder how/why i turned out this way cuz my entire family is so christian-conservative-hateful even misogynistic too 💀💀im the only leftist in this family bruhh like genuinely. and family influence is defo top 3 in influencing your political beliefs i think 

it genuinely pmo so much hearing about these people's opinions sometimes. like my youngest brother is sooo ... openly homophobic! and he said recently he hopes there will never be a woman president in the usa! 💀💀at least my other brother he's like idk.. tolerant/neutral 😭😭

ughh youve genuinely gotta be brainwashed/stupid to have some of these ideals bruh. to be so offended by people who are different from you. i still remember when some of my family came over and we were watching squid game and the instant hyun-ju (a trans woman) came on screen they were hurling death threats at her 💀 a fictional character💔🫩bro these people genuinely kill me even my little 10-ish year old cousin was fully hating

i hate christains and church so much so many of these fake ass christians that prob dont even read the bible talking about some "love your neighbor" shit but then theyre racist, homophobic, misogynistic, pedos, etc. 

i cant wait to gfto out of here and im never going to church again once im college😭😭😭

Song OTD

 

Today's song OTD is "logged in for hours" by alyzea! omgg when was the last time i did a song otd.. anyway i love how this sounds. it feels like exploring the internet as a kid and just having fun playing games and stuff. i love all the sound effects in this song & the cover 

what a joke

 i cant believe this. i just posted about how its feeling warmer and then it was freezing cold this morning. and it snowed again! 😭😭😭fake spring bruh when will winter end 

coffee

coffee story time cuz idk what to post anymore. when i was about 8~ years old i really wanted to drink coffee. my dad would make butter coffee every morning and he let me try some one day. he gave me a small cup but i liked it so i begged for more and got a huge cup ☠️ i chugged down most of it but i started feeling sick and my stomach hurt and i threw up a little while later 💔ever since then i hated coffee and avoided it #traumatized. my dad just said i told you so when i got sick bruah 😭

now idc that much but i dont have an appetite for coffee. ill have a sip of it or a mocha frappe or coffee flavored dessert but i mostly refrain from coffee stuff. also i feel like coffee doesnt really have an affect on me even when i drank something with coffee in it at night i didnt have any problems falling asleep. granted, ive never had an actual cup of coffee before bed only something with coffee mixed in but my dad is the same way so maybe i got it from him

also to me coffee looks like its almost as addictive as something like cigarettes except its more normalized 😭coffee withdrawals seem horrible and i cant imagine needing a cup of coffee to feel awake every day bruh. im glad im more of a tea/water person 

i cant wait for springgg!!

 happy march everyone. thinking about spring lately. spring has possibly the most beautiful nature of all seasons bro. when the trees finally grow their leaves back, its such a vibrant and breathtaking shade of green. and it looks so beautiful in the wind. its almost unreal like something out of a movie. and the cherry blossom trees bloom in spring too!! so pretty but they die in a couple weeks :( i drive to school now but when i took the bus my favorite parts of the day were looking at the trees/nature around me on the walk to the bus stop+home. all the bushes and flowers and the sky highkenuinely made me so happy that it made up for the 7 boring hours at school. and i loved seeing birds and bunnies and stuff too.

also in spring the weather is perfect not too cold or hot... you have the freedom to wear whatever style you want in this season. and its not dark at 5pm anymore! and fruits start getting in season again ! 

im happy that its finally feeling warmer now yippeee